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My Journey Is My Own...Your Journey Is Your Own
Last night the Lord woke me up with this picture on my heart...the kayak on shore with a paddle. When you ride in a kayak you are alone paddling the kayak. The Lord said (not audibly) something like, "MJ, this picture represents your spiritual journey with me...you, alone, are in relationship with me." Then the song by Sara Groves called "This Journey Is My Own" came to mind. I believe the Lord was speaking to me...bc I don't get up at 4:00am otherwise, for sure :) This song talks about our journey with the Lord...and that it is just that OUR journey...one on one with the Lord. No one else is involved and we are to strive to live our lives for an audience of ONE. We will stand alone before Him on judgment day...no one else will be with us. Living for an audience of One is "easier said than done" but the Lord is gracious and compassionate and He equips us to be able to do just this...as we seek Him and ask for His help. I know He has begun this process in me (living for an audience of One). Over the years I have learned more and more who I truly am in Christ...this is where my true identity lies...MJ is God's precious daughter and His love for me is unconditional and never ending...I'm secure ONLY His love (Psalm 62). This year I have been praying almost daily Psalm 37:4...asking the Lord to become THE delight of my life. I've also prayed for years that He would be THE love of my life...that I truly would seek the Kingdom of God...seek HIM...above all other things, as it tells us to do in Matthew. However, I have struggled throughout my life with seeking other things (idols) more than God (others' approval and acceptance of MJ; love of others; success in school, work, athletics; etc.) Anyway, the Lord hears our prayers and He answers them but not necessarily in the ways we'd like Him to :) As many of you know, this past 18 months have been some of the toughest months of my life (I've been asking Him to become THE delight of my life, so it's my own fault). I know that I am in the Refiner's Fire...I sure hope that He is skimming off all of the dross (impurities)...because I don't want all of this "pain" to be for nothing :) Seriously, I do know my Papa and He would never allow me to hurt for no reason. He is making me...shaping me...into His vessel to be used for Godly purposes. Oh, how I long to be used for Godly purposes!(II Timothy 2:21)!! But I can not stand being in the refiner's fire...it burns/hurts too much and you don't necessarily understand why you are there and what dross (impurities) need to be gotten rid of??? However, I do know my Redeemer, my Savior, my King, my Papa and I trust His character...so I stay in the fire. He is with me. I want to live my life for Him...the audience of One. How about you? Do you want to live your life for an audience of One? Ask God to help you...today...to seek Him and His approval above all others. Sara Groves
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